Stretching Out The Universe. And God is speeding it up for all to see. Why?

After comments on the impending Super Baal game (that will be on our overhead projector in under an hour), pastor starts the sermon.

First Pastor Chronister reminds us that these 3 things are somehow related:
Stretching out the universe
Making of our soul/spirit
Laying the Foundations of the Earth

Let’s look at Zachariah 12:1. Pastor reads and comments. Careful, you might learn something here. That leads us to Proverbs 26:13-16. This one leads you to an understanding of a lazy man.

Pastor is going to great lengths to help us understand something very profound; the lazy slothful servant Jesus talks about in Matthew 25.

Pastor says the stretching out of the universe has something to do with the laziness and slothfulness of this servant. Confused yet? Anyone would be if this is the first sermon they hear from this pastor. The stretching out of the universe is a type of forgiveness of sin. This stretching out and forgiving sin can only be done by God, and He does it ALONE. That's important.

People today will readily exchange Christ for a created being and call it God.

Pastor goes on now to explain this increased speed that God is now stretching out the universe. What does this mean? What is God telling us by doing this? From here I'll let you listen because this stuff is very important. You'll understand why when you press play on this sermon.

Our Pastor and we here at Cliffside want to thank you all for listening. If you have any questions or words of encouragement for Pastor Chronister, he would be happy to hear from you. Feel free to write him a letter or an email, or just pick up the phone and give him a call.